So, I promised to update this blog with the good and bad of my journey. I have been in a long slump of bad. Things in my life got crazy. And with the crazy, I lost my focus and determination. I still got up and went to the gym in the mornings, but found myself making it only 2-3 times a week instead of 4-5. My eating went to pot, I wasn't saying no to anything "good" and eating whatever. Trust me, my body reacted to the "bad" I was putting in my body while I was telling myself that it was "good." It is a testament to myself that we, as a society, are making ourselves sick with what we are choosing to eat. Processed = not natural and, while I don't know about you, my body does not handle this very well. It became more apparent than ever to me during this slump when I was putting more processed crap into my body.
As a result of all of this, I kept expecting to start gaining all my weight back, but didn't. I stayed pretty consistent. I have gone up and down with 3 pounds. The lowest I have been is 215 and the highest in this period is 220. More consistently, I am around 217-218. This morning, I got on the scale for the first time in awhile and it said I was at 218. For completely losing my focus that is not too bad. That means that I still have learned something in this journey, even if my food choices lately have not been stellar.
In this time-frame, my work highlighted me on the progress that I have made. I thought the highlight was for a smaller subset of people but it ended up being company wide. While it is cool, it was a little unnerving to have people walk up to me that didn't really know about my journey and congratulate me. Especially in a period when I was really struggling! I have to be honest that I felt guilty whenever I gave in and ate a treat, wondering what people would think when they saw me eating it. Come on! This is real life, I shouldn't feel guilty!
I was so strict with my food at the beginning of my journey. I did learn a lot. I learned about portion sizes and pairings that are the best. However, life is real and it became a struggle to maintain that level of strictness all the time, especially since I have 3 other people in my home that I am feeding.
Well, I rededicated myself. There is a quote by Winston Churchill that I have been thinking A TON about lately. It is, "Never give up on something that you can't go a day without thinking about." I may have been in a slump, but I never, not once, stopped thinking about my journey to be more healthy. Yes, being more healthy means that I will lose weight, and while it is one of my motivations to be able to buy cute, real, inexpensive clothing, that is not the end all. This is about me being healthy. This is about me being here for my boys. Being here for when my boys grow up and get married and have children of their own! I want to be around for a long time and not have my life cut short because of my poor choices.
The above quote has been instrumental in helping me rededicate my efforts. Today is Thursday, and I have been to the gym every single day this week. That is right. Every. Single. Day. It hasn't been easy getting back into the groove of waking up early every single day. But I do it. Every day this week I have lifted weights and done a HIIT treadmill workout that I got from Livy Loves to Run. If you have not heard of her, check her out. She is from Springville, UT, so local to me. She inspires me. She started last spring walking with her kids and has lost 100 pounds! She has done it all on her own.
On Tuesday, I had some co-workers tell me that I had lost more weight. I chuckled and told them that I weighed the same now that I have for quite awhile now. I haven't measured myself so I don't know what my measurements are and I haven't taken a picture since the last challenge with Body Buddies that I participated in finished. I told them thank you, but that I was actually in a slump that I was working on getting out of. It is hard work! I am hoping that I am on the upward climb of this slump. I am focusing more on what I am eating and how much I am eating. I have never counted calories on my journey but have been thinking more about utilizing the My Fitness Pal app.
Life is hard. It sometimes gets in the way of the goals we set. It is up to us to not lose sight of those goals, even when it gets harder in the process of achieving them. That is what I am doing right now. I am refocusing on the goals that I have set for myself. I can do it. I am strong.
By the way, for the month of October, I have accepted a challenge to not have any candy from October 1st to Halloween. Funny, that the day that I decide to accept this challenge, the Toblorone Chocolate bar that has been sitting on my cupboard since December started calling my name. I vowed to remain candy free though, so it will have to just waste its voice. I will not listen to it.
